Happy Holidays from Hell
by Eric Waters

Charles Chapman wrote the very first "Tale from the Road" to appear in Guitar Sessions, calling it "The Gig from Hell." Perhaps it's fitting that we close out the year with a story about a guitarist who takes an apparent journey through hell on his way home from a gig.

Stephen Rekas
Guitar Sessions Editor

I am a guitarist living in the Virginia suburbs of Washington D.C. where I play, publish, teach, record, and license my music for use. Last year, I finished a CD entitled By the Water's Edge. I'm very proud of it but it was tons of work, especially close to the end. At the time, I was also working as a music professor in the most expensive university in the U.S. I'll let you guess which.

I subsequently left my job as music professor. Constantly trying to look both intelligent and pompous was becoming too much. I could only manage one or the other. Since then, I've started a small music production company called Waters Music Design which offers music composed for commercial use including: film, video games, advertising, websites, tracks for singers, etc.

Boy, I used to think I was busy before I quit my job! Working alone has really been a challenge. Being both the janitor and the president of a small company is tough. Lately, I've been working to compose and produce music to be used in a video news release for a graduate seminar at Georgetown University. I've been spending quite a lot of time in my studio, sometimes working until 3:00 a.m. I tell my friends that I'm pretty much a hermit at this point.

Not long ago, I took a break from my studio work to play another gig. It was a short, easy job, close to home with good pay- the kind I like. The drive home was miserable as it was cold and rainy. I also knew I would be faced with another late night of mixing tunes.

Close to home, I topped a hill to see a huge glowing sign reading... "HELL". Every episode of The Twilight Zone passed through my head. I kept picturing William Shatner's Twilight Zone episode and thinking, "How would Captain Kirk handle this?"

Being reasonably certain that my car has no phasers to set on stun, my first instinct was to turn around. I knew that wouldn't work. Besides, any respectable Twilight Zone episode would have the same sign confounding me if I traveled in the opposite direction (duh!). There was also the thought of my warm, dry condo ahead with its beckoning holiday lights.

In true "Kirkian" fashion, I made my ultimate command decision... "What if I hunker down and quietly drive past the sign?" Beelzebub might be looking the other way at that very moment. Hey, you never know.

Naturally, I was equipped with a CD appropriate for the occasion. I popped Mussorgsky's "The Old Castle" from Pictures at an Exhibition, a selection from my new Mel Bay book- Music for Flute & Guitar, into the CD player. I now had a nasty night with appropriate music for "Kirkian" hunkering. I drove on. At least I didn't have Scotty nagging me about possibly blowing up the ship.

As I approached the sign, a dense fog rolled in. "Great," I thought, "Now I've got HELL, 'The Old Castle,' The Twilight Zone, and The Fog!" Closer... closer... a tad more hunkering and AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!

I looked up to see it was just a Shell gas station with a burned out letter. Whew!

Happy Holidays to you all from "HELL" (Annandale, VA),
Eric Waters

E-mail: eric@watersguitar.com
Web-site: www.watersguitar.com
Web-site: www.watersmusicdesign.com

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About the Author

Eric Waters graduated from George Mason University, receiving a Bachelor of Music Degree with a concentration in Classical Guitar Performance. Since 1972, he has performed professionally on electric, classical and steel-string acoustic guitars, touring extensively throughout two-thirds of the United States and portions of Canada.

His performing experiences range from working with such notables as the legendary Chuck Berry to classic guitar master classes with Brazilian virtuoso Carlos Barbosa-Lima. He has performed for such eminent figures as U.S. Supreme Court Justice, Sandra Day O'Conner and Queen Beatrix of The Netherlands. He has also made appearances on local radio and television.

Mr. Waters' compositions have received prizes in regional and national competitions resulting in invitations to serve as a judge in The Mid-Atlantic Song Contest. Selected by the Virginia Commission for the Arts, he has been included among the candidates for the Virginia State Community College Artist Residency Program.

For 16 years he served as an Instructor of Guitar in the Music Department of George Washington University. Presently, he is the owner of Waters Music Design - a studio for the commercial production of music.

As a freelance writer, Mr. Waters has contributed to Guitar Player Magazine. Classical Guitar Magazine (United Kingdom) praised his first Mel Bay Publications book, Guitar Music from Tres Libros de Música: The Oldest Surviving Music for the Guitar [99229BCD], as "scholarly". Watch for Eric Waters' new book, Music for Flute & Guitar- forthcoming from Mel Bay Publications.